Are you trustworthy?

We would all like to think of ourselves as trustworthy. I mean, who wants to go around saying I'm a liar and a cheater? One thing I pride myself on, is doing what I say I am going to do. If you know me, then you know this to be true and I won't have friends that are constantly letting me down either. Another thing I pride myself on is telling the truth. Have I ever lied before? Yes, of course, we all have. (and it usually ends very badly) In general, I tell the truth whether or not it is what people want to hear, even if it goes against the crowd.

To the outside world we all consider ourselves to be trustworthy, but are we trustworthy to ourselves? Probably not.....

For me, there are 2 parts in trusting myself. One, is doing what I say I am going to do in regards of promises I make to myself. The second is trusting my natural instincts.

With the first, I trust myself so little that I write myself reminders. Currently on my dry erase board I have written I reminder list: eat right, exercise, drink lots of water, meditate, blog daily. How am I doing so far? I ate hamburger and fries yesterday, I didn't exercise or meditate and I only drank one glass of water but plenty of coffee and tea. I am blogging daily but that is only because I can sit on my arse drinking coffee, eating junk food and avoid the exercise bit while doing so. In reality I only do all of these things 1 out of 7 days of the week. I hit most on most days but I definitely don't do All everyday.

I ask myself why? When I promise to do something for a friend or family member I do it. Why don't I treat myself with the same respect? I wish I had an answer for this but I don't. I am hoping that by "outing" myself I will improve in this area. What promises do you make to yourself and break? Spend some time thinking about this and see if you can improve in this area. (now its time to go make a second pot of coffee, just kidding)

The second area where I lack trust is using my intuition. Throughout my life I have stood in front of someone and a little voice inside my head tells me not to trust them or I am in a business deal and something tells me that things are not right. What do I do? I ignore this little voice. Since I can't logically find a reason to trust it, I ignore it. All the facts seem correct or the person seems honest so I just go with the facts that are in front of me. My subconscious mind is obviously picking up on something that I am not but because I don't have "evidence" or I can't logically reason these thoughts to be true, I ignore them.

I don't understand why I do this time and time again. I have proven my intuition to be pretty accurate when I do follow it but instead I ignore it and I end up in bad relationship, in a bad job or just a bad situation in general. I could have saved myself a lot of heartache and pain if I had only listened to that little voice.

I guess the reason I don't always listen is fear. Fear of being wrong. What if that person really is a good person or what if I am passing up an opportunity of a lifetime? I suppose I should remind myself of every time I was right including the times I didn't listen. We are all born with intuition. As children we used our intuition to steer clear of danger. Sometimes people just gave us a creepy feeling and we stayed away from them. Animals use intuition, that's why a dog is friendly to some people but growls at others. As a child intuition saved my life.

One afternoon I was supposed to go somewhere with my mother. I just had a really bad feeling. I told her this and said I didn't want to go. She kept trying to talk me into it but this time I was adamant, I would not go. I told her I didn't think she should go either. Her heart was set on her previous plans so off she went. A mile from our home she was T-boned crossing the highway. The front passenger side of the car was smashed in all the way to the drivers side. My mother escaped with some bruises and a few stitches; however, if I didn't follow my intuition I probably wouldn't be typing this blog today.

I could fill this blog with countless stories where I used my intuition and saved myself from bad experiences and I could also tell you countless stories of when I didn't. I guess the reason why I don't follow my intuition is the same reason why everyone doesn't. It sounds a little kooky. I mean, if I am sitting at a car dealership filling out financial paperwork it's just not acceptable to say, "I've changed my mind, the little voice in my head keeps saying this isn't a good idea". I would sound like a loon. I guess this is the reason we all ignore our intuition. If everything appears to be ok then what logical reason do we have? When I ask myself this, the answer I keep coming up with is proof of how many times I have been right in the past. I guess I owe it to myself to listen up when intuition speaks. I need to trust myself a little more and save myself from future frustrations and pain.


I guess we could all learn to trust ourselves a little more

Now if only I could come up with the winning lottery numbers....